Honor thy parent always?

Q: I am wondering about the commandment to honor thy father and thy mother. Is a person breaking this commandment if he removes himself from toxic parents who are absolutely not worthy of honor (abuse of every kind occurring in childhood)?

A: The Fifth Commandment is "Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee." (Exodus 20:12)

Parents are to be honored and feared; reverence is to be shown to them with heart, mouth and hand, in thought, word and deed.

But first, the father and mother must understand that they have a responsibility toward their children. Christian parents must be the nurturers and protectors of the child. They protect the children by making sure they are being properly cared for mentally, physically, financially and spiritually, which will promote and build a stronger spiritual life.

In this demand for reverence to parents, the Fifth Commandment lays the foundation for the sanctification of life, inasmuch as it teaches us to acknowledge a divine authority.

The sum of the commandment, therefore, will be that we are to look up to those whom the Lord has set over us, yielding them honor and gratitude.

But if a parent is not worthy of this commandment, is a child breaking the commandment?

One must examine the Bible for truth and understanding.

First, you must realize that the Bible is written for Christians. If a Christian parent is provoking a child to suffer by his lifestyle, abuse or any ungodly behavior, that parent does not deserve honor in the eyes of God.

To that end, the Scripture tells Christian parents not to provoke their children to suffer. A Christian should know the right way of training a child, and if that parent is having difficulty in some areas, he or she should seek medical, financial, mental and spiritual help.

A child does not fall under a curse nor should the child be led to believe that he or she is doing something wrong by refusing to follow ungodly parents.

The child, if able, should seek help immediately to be removed from that environment so the child and the parent can receive the proper help.

Christians must understand that in order for them to have their children under subjection to them and follow the commandments of God, parents must be under the subjection of God first and his commandments.

Therefore, parents who dishonor God's law should remove themselves from receiving respect from that child.