Don't misread signs of mental illness

Q- "My 8-year-old niece has been diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar disorder. She is in special classes and wants to read but cannot do so very well. We need help understanding these problems and how to assist her." -- An Aunt in Atlanta.

A- When one Atlanta boy fell asleep in class because he was three days into switching medications for bipolar disorder, the school's vice principal asked his mom to promise to have the child "all straightened out" by the end of the week.

"I have never wanted to slap someone in the face before," recalls the mother 10 years later. She says families can expect to face a lot of ignorance about mental illness, but also have many resources and support groups to turn to for help and education.

Rosalie Greenberg, M.D., a child psychiatrist in Summit, N.J., agrees: "Education is key for parents, family members, teachers, anybody who comes into contact with the child."

Bipolar disorder in children has a pattern of rapid-cycling mood swings, whereas in adults the extreme highs and lows last for longer periods, Greenberg says. The irritability, inattention and aggressiveness of a bipolar child look similar to symptoms of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. But the brain chemistry behind each is different.

"Bipolar disorder is not about bad parenting. Biology plays a major role here," says Greenberg, author of "Bipolar Kids," (Perseus Publishing, 2007). "It's the whole picture that makes the diagnosis."

If a child is appropriately diagnosed and treated for bipolar first and then ADHD if necessary, she needs to be tested for learning disabilities, including the reading disorder dyslexia, Greenberg says.

A mother in Raleigh, N.C., who has a teenager who has been treated for bipolar and ADHD for several years, agrees:

"What testing for learning disabilities has the girl had?" the mother asks. "Being ADHD and bipolar does not explain why the child cannot read."

If the child has not had extensive special testing for her reading issues, ask for it, the mother says. Even demand it if necessary. The niece needs all the help she can get from the school system, including an Individualized Education Plan, and a counselor who is her advocate within the school system.

A mother in Dalton, Ga., says a mentally ill child with learning problems needs a good psychiatrist who is well-versed in medications and how they interact with each other.

"My husband and I are the parents of a 23-year-old daughter with early-onset bipolar," the mom says. "There are many things we have learned during her growing-up years. She had experienced similar learning problems."

Her advice: The family needs to seek the support of other families in similar situations; and the child needs her friends and relatives to see the good in her, not just the challenges.

"Above all," says the mother of a 21-year-old daughter and 15-year-old son who are bipolar, "do not ever quit advocating for the child." Her two kids have been on meds since elementary school and have done well with their own education plans.

Designer Dana Buchman, the mother of a daughter with a learning disability, agrees: "I travel around the country a lot doing trunk shows for my apparel company," says Buchman, author of "Special Education: One Family's Journey Through the Maze of Learning Disabilities" (Da Capo Press, 2007). Other women's comments about their own or other children with what she calls "learning differences" make her think back to when she found out about her daughter's learning disability 15 years ago.

"If I had known then what I know now, how different and easier those years would have been, not just for me and Charlotte, but for our whole family," Buchman says. "I trust that in time, the aunt and the rest of the family will come to see the niece as who she really is -- a girl with unique abilities."

PARENTING TIP

May is National Mental Health Month. For related resources and research information, The National Institute of Mental Health website is www.nimh.gov. The National Alliance on Mental Illness Web site is www.nami.org or call the helpline at 800-950-6264. Another resource is "The Bipolar Child: The Definitive and Reassuring Guide to Childhood's Most Misunderstood Disorder" by Demitri Papolos, M.D., and his wife, Janice Papolos (Broadway, 2006).