If you're over 40, it's OK to admit that you feel cheated. No, not because, in the words of Uncle Miltie, it now takes you all night to do what you once could do all night. Not even because you are untouched by the so-called musical or fashion stylings of Christina Aguilera or P. Diddy.

You can feel cheated because, chances are, none of your favorite television shows bowed out with grandiose farewells that commanded $2 million-a-minute from advertisers.

In other words, "The Andy Griffith Show" finale wasn't a main event.

The "Friends" finale this week was treated, in contrast, as the second coming -- "going?" -- while shows from an earlier era usually bowed out gracefully. Or fizzled out.

Neither of the two greatest shows ever, "Sanford & Son" and the aforementioned "Andy," had a memorable parting episode. As a TV connoisseur, it pains me to admit that I had to go on-line to find out how they wound up.

That's because both shows, sadly, had jumped the shark long before the end and simply morphed into inferior spinoffs. Who remembers with more than just perfunctory nostalgia "Sanford Arms" or "Mayberry RFD"?

If society had been as celebrity-obsessed then as it is now -- and had TV producers been able to hoodwink the public into thinking that a show's passing was really significant -- old-time series would also have been given extravagant sendoffs into syndication.

As someone who never watched a minute of "Friends" I can't comment on its artistic merit -- although with each of its stars receiving a million dollars an episode, it should have been mighty funny. I can say, though, that the public relations firm responsible for making people think show's denouement mattered deserves a special award.

Of course, it's hard to imagine people all over America getting together for parting-shot parties for "All in the Family" or "The Jeffersons." As far as I remember, no television stations sponsored look-a-like contests for the cast of "Sanford & Son."

Me: Sweet Thang, you should enter that contest. When the moon hits you just right, you're the spittin' image of Aunt Esther.

Sweet Thang: Oh yeah? Well, when I hit your eye just right, your mama will look like like the spittin' image of Bubba. POW!

The earnings of the "Sanford & Son" and "The Andy Griffith Show" stars never rivaled those of the "Friends'" cast, but their cultural impact and resonance will eclipse that of "Friends." Think about it: How many people will be making pilgrimages to the "Friends" set 40 years from now -- as they do to Mount Airy, the real-life model for Mayberry?

Just for the record -- Donna thinks Fred is cheating on her in the final episode of "Sanford & Son." When she and Lamont investigate, they discover Freddie is indeed leading a secret life: he has gone back to school to earn his GED, since he'd had to drop out of school during the Depression.

On "The Jeffersons," George ran off with Florence -- I knew all of that arguing masked genuine affection -- leaving Weezy all alone in that Park Avenue penthouse. (OK, I made that up.)

"The Andy Griffith Show" ended with Andy and Helen marrying and leaving Mayberry.

I think I saw them sipping latte at Starbucks on Glenwood Avenue the other day.