For USO, caring is the key

It's a homey headquarters where an extended family volunteers to help

JACKSONVILLE -- There are three rules for USO volunteers handing out care packages to Camp Lejeune Marines heading off to battle: "You never say 'goodbye,' " says USO state President Judy Pitchford. "You say, 'Be safe' or 'See you soon.' 'Goodbye' sounds so final.

"You don't cry. You can cry after the buses leave, and we do.

"And you never look at their name tags. You look at their faces and give them a big smile. When we lose one, you don't want to remember that you were the USO volunteer who handed them their care packages when they left."

And you thought your job was tough? Try smiling at these brave young faces day after day, regiment after regiment, year after year, as they board buses bound for the uncertainty of war.

But that's a day's work at the USO in downtown Jacksonville. Since 1941, USO volunteers and staff members here have been taking care of Camp Lejeune Marines, sailors and their families. It is the oldest continuously operating USO in the world.

Sarah Beth Burchell is the wife of a Navy corpsman just back from the war. She is also the newly hired USO center director here. She says of her new job, "This is my contribution, my way of taking care of my extended family. I want to do the best job I can for them."

Family.

Everybody here uses that word to describe life in and around the Marine Corps. They don't talk about patriotism or brag about the proud heritage of the corps or have heated discussions on the politics of war. That is fodder for talk radio blabbers and recruiting posters.

These are Marine families. They tell you stories like this:

Melanie Landree, a Marine wife from Plano, Texas, whose husband is in Iraq: "I have a large family of my own, but they're a long way from here. Sometimes when I'm feeling really lonely, I'll just drive to the base to be around my Marine family. I feel better there. I know I'm not alone when I'm around Marines."

Burchell says, "When my husband is deployed, I'll take my son to his play group. Sometimes he'll run up to someone in uniform and hug his legs, thinking it's his daddy. That can be tough."

Tough? Try listening to an 18-year-old wife -- a girl, really -- sobbing out her loneliness and fear on the other end of the telephone. Hearing that and then doing something about it is part of what Landree does to stay busy while her husband is at war.

Any old veteran will tell you there was a time when sergeants growled, "If the Marine Corps wanted you to have a wife, it would have issued you one."

No more. Now every deployed unit leaves an officer and a sergeant at home to take care of the unit families.

Unit wives such as Landree are the first responders -- the Corps calls them "Key Volunteers" -- when the loneliness gets too great and the questions too many.

"They come to us with problems their husbands used to take care of," she says. "Everything from where to buy tires to how to call a utility company.

"I love doing it. Some of these girls are so young they could be my daughters. They haven't been anywhere, done anything and now they're all alone with their husband in Iraq, and they're scared. Some I call every week to see how they're doing. Some I call every other day."

If the Marines are just one big family, the Jacksonville USO is grandma's house. It's where everybody is welcome and everybody is nice to you.

It's where the food is good, the furniture comfortable and the people care about you when you don't show up. Maybe it's a little old and not in the newest or best part of town, but when you walk through the door, you know you're with your people.