Kay Nunnery touched lives across the state through her profession.
As director of health benefits for the N.C. League of Municipalities, it was often Nunnery who went to bat for clients who were initially turned down for some sort of medical coverage.
"She would generally find a way to get that piece of equipment paid for. She'd do her research, and she'd get it approved," said Bob Haynes, her boss at the League and a friend for almost 20 years. "She just genuinely cared about people. I think what she had was a calling."
After becoming ill with lung cancer, Nunnery touched total strangers through her faith.
A lifelong nonsmoker who was 45 when she was diagnosed, Nunnery had no risk factors for the disease. She was a private person, but she shared her illness with friends and family through a series of e-mails that always included a Bible verse and expressions of the profound comfort her faith provided. They ended up being circulated to prayer circles and Bible study groups beyond those who knew her in person.
"That e-mail thing just sort of snowballed," said her husband, Kevin Nunnery. "It brought people into this situation that we didn't even know."
Kay Nunnery died in March, 19 months after being diagnosed with cancer. She was 47.
After Nunnery's death, staff members at Providence Baptist Church, which she attended with her husband and son, gathered her e-mails and created a blog of them: http://kaynunnery.blogspot.com/
"I think the way she dealt with it was something they wanted to share. And that's part of Kay's legacy," Kevin said. "She chronicled her ordeal and wrote in such a faithful way and loving way that hopefully those messages will be helpful for a family that's going through this or has someone going through this."
Colorful and caring
Kay Nunnery was born in Fayetteville and raised in Fuquay-Varina, one of three sisters. She graduated from N.C. Wesleyan College and went on to work for the League for close to 20 years.
Her work in health benefits meant she often dealt with people going through extremely stressful situations who weren't always getting the answers they wanted to hear. And she'd set out to help them.
"Kay had the ability to make the person she was talking to feel like they were the most important person in the world and to her at that moment," Haynes said. "She genuinely liked people and genuinely cared for people, and it came through."
The League serves "cities, towns and villages literally from Murphy to Kill Devil Hills," Haynes said. Nunnery's core value at work was to positively affect the employees and their families in all those places, he said.
"Kay's mantra is we need to be able to provide a meaningful benefit at a reasonable cost," he said.
Kay Nunnery set high standards for herself and others in her professional life. She was also stylish and funny, surrounded by friends and family whom she loved to surprise with presents. When traveling for business, she was often the only woman with a group of men who teased her about her brightly colored, Vera Bradley luggage. But she made sure her colleagues came home with gifts for their wives and girlfriends.
"She was one of the guys, but she was a lady," said Dottie Haynes, Bob's wife and also a longtime friend to Kay. "She would keep them straight, make them toe the line."
Everyday 'events'
Nunnery loved to travel, and a frequent companion was Kim Worsham, a former neighbor. They both loved the beach and visited the sea and sand as far away as Mexico. They never went to surf or snorkel.
"We liked to do the same thing which was a whole lot of nothing," Worsham said as she laughed.
At the same time, Nunnery always extended herself beyond what others would do.
"She always made every day more of an event," Worsham said. "Kay would have a wine and cheese party on a Friday afternoon with silver platters. Things people don't go to the trouble to do, she did just in living her life."
Nunnery likely would have said her greatest accomplishment was her 11-year-old son, Andrew. Neighbors Brenda and Moe Dew helped the Nunnerys by taking Kay to appointments and keeping her company. Brenda Dew said Kay would pace out her day so that she could rally when Andrew got in from school, keeping things normal for him.
While Kevin took Andrew hunting and fishing, Kay focused on teaching him other skills, even persuading him to take part in Cotillion. His final event for the year was just days after Kay's funeral, and Dottie Haynes watched him mingle comfortably with the other kids before she stepped in for the dance he'd have done with his mother.
"I thought, 'Kay's smiling right now,'" she said.
Along with her husband and son, Nunnery is survived by her mother, two sisters, two nieces and two nephews. The family requests memorial contributions to the N.C. Lung Cancer Partnership.
