In response to your March 1 story on the marriage amendment, I want to share my thoughts as someone affected by this issue. My fiance and I are getting married in October in Chapel Hill. Sadly our joy as we plan to commit to each other is dampened by a proposed amendment that vilifies us and our relationship as perverse.

I grew up thinking that gays and lesbians led alternative lifestyles, but the truth is that we in the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community vary as much as straight people. Some, like my fiance and I, want to marry and raise a family, some prefer to be single and some partner without wanting government recognition. Gay people are not the boogeymen that proponents of this amendment would have you believe. History has shown that no amount of vilification will change who we are; it will, however, corrode the society that fosters it.

The motto of my church when it comes to public issues is Standing on the Side of Love. For those on the fence about same-sex marriage, I urge you to ask yourself which is the side of love, and which is the side of hate, ignorance and fear.

Kate McFarland, Carrboro