Stamping out 'S-words' in our schools

A few years ago my grandson came home from kindergarten and confided in his mother that someone to his class had said the "S word."

She asked who the culprit was. Although the boy her son named was the bossy type, he didn't seem like a 5-year-old given to scatological discourse.

Bracing herself, she asked Wade to spell the "S word" he had heard at school.

He did: "S-h-u-t u-p."

Yes, my friends, "Shut up!" is regarded as a "no-no" in today's elementary schools.

And well it should be. What is more nerve-grindingly rude than hearing a young whippersnapper shouting, "Shut up!" to an adult, or even a playmate?

When I was a kid, my mom worried that I might bring home head lice or scabies from school, but she never worried that I'd come home mouthing such obscenities as "Heck fire!" or "Darn!"

During my grandson's last visit (he is now 8), I cornered him long enough to ask what "bad" words he's hearing at school these days. Despite our close bond, the age barrier is still there. The worst he could come up with was "darn." Later, he admitted he has heard a couple of classmates use the bona fide "S word."

'But Daddy says it'

Parents traditionally have worried about their kids picking up off-color language from our schools. In many cases, they should worry as much or more about language at home. Some parents ban, "It sucks!" and "Omigod," while others repeat the phrases as often as their kids.

At a Raleigh friend's home, when one of the kids muttered a word not in the family's approved vocabulary, he was reprimanded by his mom. The youngster submitted his defense: "But Daddy says it all the time when we're watching basketball."

To get the facts for this "bad word" investigative piece, I consulted a fourth-grade teacher in the Wake County schools.

The problem does not seem to be out of control, at least not in her school.

Yes, "Shut up!" is on the teacher's hit list. And sometimes a couple of girls chasing each other across the school yard can be heard screaming, "Whore!" and worse.

"But we quickly let them know that such language is not tolerated at school and shouldn't be anywhere," the teacher said. "Usually, before I can talk to the offending students, six or seven other children have reported the incident to me."

In innocent days

This "bad word" discussion reminded my wife of a short story by Doris Betts, one of our favorite authors.

"The Spies in the Herb House" is set during World War II in her native Statesville, once recognized as the "Herb Capital of the World."

An abandoned herb house, a dark and forbidding building, was a point of fascination for little Doris and best friend Betty Lou as they absorbed the daily disturbing news on the radio of German conquests in Europe. They eventually decided the herb house was occupied by German spies.

One Wednesday they noticed four letters had been chalked on the herb house door.

Alarmed, they immediately began trying to decipher the message:

"F? F For Fuhrer? Or Fatherland? And U. Could U stand for United States?

Then the entire message hit Doris.

"I almost screamed aloud. It was meant for Betty Sue and me, and no one else. It was a personal threat. It was an indication of the terrible slant of the Nazi mind. Those letters! Don't you see what they stand for? ... Fight Until Children Killed. Fight until the children are killed."

No, alas, we can't return to those days of innocence at the herb house. But if we continue to enforce, at home and at school, the "Obscenity not spoken here!" rule, we will be able to maintain at least a tolerable civil tongue in our youngsters' mouths.

Not so fast

Last week's column said the ACC has 14 members. It will have 14 with the future addition of Pitt and Syracuse, but for the now, the conference has 12 members.