My phone made a little tinkly noise to let me know it had received a text message. And here is what it said:
"ANY fresh vegetables. For God's sake. Spinach, carrots, lettuce. We R done here!"
I have no idea who sent it or why they were so angry about vegetable acquisition, but it definitely was a classic texting fail.
I texted back: "Wrong recipient."
They texted back: "Sorry." This was followed by the frownie face emoticon that I ALWAYS get backward so I end up sending emails or texts that say "So sorry to hear about your grandmother's passing (: "
It wasn't the first wrong message I've gotten. There have been plenty.
A favorite was: "I'll be by to take you to church around 10 just like I am EVERY SINGLE SUNDAY OF MY LIFE."
Whoa. Resent much?
And then there was the one sent from Duh Hubby's friend who thought he was texting Duh after a UNC loss.
"#$% Kentucky," it said.
"Indeed," I responded. I had no idea who this was but, well, #$% Kentucky. Whoever it was, we had common ground in matters of the gravest basketball importance.
Texting fails are appallingly common in my age division.
Dad: "Your mom and I are going to divorce next month."
Daughter: "WHAT?!? Why?!? Call me. Please!!!"
Dad: "I wrote "Disney" and the damn phone changed it. We are going to DISNEY next month." There are some legendary texting fails, but the worst was probably the one in which the young woman accidentally texted her father instead of her best friend to announce that she had "finally" lost her virginity.
The Internet wouldn't lie, would it?
I have to admit that I kind of like the little tinkly noise the phone makes because receiving a text makes me feel special, and, yes, I realize how pathetic that sounds. The only texts I hate are those creepy telemarketing texts. I'm not sure how they got my number, but what kind of idge would say, "Ha! I never thought about buying life insurance before but, well, this unknown phone number seems to think that it would be a great idea so I'm going to reply 'Yes!' "
The phone company itself loves to text. I'd had a new cellphone for just a couple of days when it texted me an auto quiz in which I was asked to spend a few minutes rating their customer service.
Right. Like all I have to do is sit here and drive and answer a bunch of stupid questions on my phone to help them out. Fat chance. And when did companies become so needy anyway? You can't buy a dang Dustbuster without the manufacturer robo-calling or texting to find out if there's anything, anything at all, they could've done to make the purchase a better buying experience.
It picks up crumbs; I'm not trying to marry it. Let's move on. (:
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