Howard A. Goodman: Glitter litter

December 22, 2013 

Want to wish me a Merry Christmas? Don’t send me anything with glitter – cards, wrappings, nothing. Glitter does not remain with the item to which it was originally attached. Instead, like a virus it quietly migrates to surrounding horizontal surfaces, floors, hands and eventually mouths.

Do we have any idea how much glitter we ingest? To wit, I just opened an envelope containing a well-intentioned greeting card, only to unleash a colony of glitter. The stray glitter now graces a desktop, my pants and the seasonal year-end letter that shared the envelope with the glitterized greeting card. A countertop in our kitchen still shows evidence of glitter from articles that visited there briefly, weeks ago.

Honestly, next time I open an envelope I suspect contains glitter, I will immediately take it outside ... or maybe not open it at all. Puh-leese. Like asbestos, let’s outlaw glitter.

Howard A. Goodman


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