What's your excuse?

As the number of alleged wives has grown, the story has only gotten better and better.

It has inspired memories of nursery rhymes: As I was going to St. Ives, I met a man with seven wives. ...

I've thought of 1950s movie musicals: "Seven Brides for, um ... One Brother."

And, of course, I've thought of polygamist cults.

In this case, seven of the eight devotees were oblivious to the rest.

But, hey, I do give Wilkins credit.

For one thing, he used a kind of math virtually unheard of in newspaper stories about wandering feet.

Instead of subtracting -- killing off current wife to marry another -- he seems to have kept adding.

And adding.

And adding.

In addition to the three women who have come forward claiming to be his wives -- one in Richmond (formerly in Cary), one in Clayton and one in Atlanta -- there are reportedly three more women who claim him as the hub in Virginia. And one in Arizona.

There are so many questions I'd love to hear answered. How did he get not one but several women to say yes? Were there flowers and wooing or just the infamous gas station pickup line, "Hey, Miss Lady"?

Are women that hard up?

Isn't it hard enough to be married to one person?

Also, on a purely practical level, how did he juggle the logistics?

I have to believe he had a system -- like different pairs of underwear for different days of the week.

If it's Sunday, it must be plaid boxers in Richmond.

On Monday, boxer briefs in Atlanta.

On Tuesday, tightie whities in Cary.

And Friday? That's got to be satiny black bikinis in Cary.

He was, after all, a creature of habit.

We have photographic evidence he wore the same suit for at least two of his weddings. I guess when you find a look that works ... .

What the wives were thinking on the days or weeks they didn't see hubby is unclear. Was he taking the dog on a really long walk? Do business trips last six months?

It's also unclear whether Wilkins contributed his fair share of the rent in three -- or up to seven -- locales.

Either way, I hope he was saving up his loose change because whenever his criminal troubles are over -- Atlanta wife plans to pursue bigamy charges against Wilkins in Miami, where her wedding occurred -- Wilkins is going to be wide open to civil vengeance.

And, based on the comments of three of the women who have talked to the paper, there's plenty of vengeance to be had.

In fact, while Wilkins might have celebrated earlier this week when he received probation rather than prison time for his illegal alliances, personally I think he should have fired his appointed lawyer.

It seems to me, with seven women out there who thought they were his wives -- Wilkins might just have been safer behind bars.

It's one thing to have a creative understanding of "cleave only unto her."

But right now, I'd be more worried about "until death do us part" taking on an uncomfortably literal meaning.