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Young adults without 'soft skills' in the workplace will face hard landing in life

Manners matter. Imagine that, Mom was right. Listen more, talk less, be polite, consider others, work hard, team play, show up on time, shine your shoes and don't slouch. Think before you speak.

But many recent graduates cannot communicate or play well with others. They lack critical "soft skills" such as basic office etiquette, communication, leadership and team skills. In a business setting, where customers, sales and the company's reputation are on the line, employers are increasingly unhappy with the graduates available for hire.

Our graduates have technical skills, more computer aptitude than ever before. But without the soft skills to honor others and themselves, they have little chance of successful long-term careers. After all, even the best of us loves to watch "rude guy" get kicked to the curb. Business leaders are eager to comply.

Nationally, the picture is bleak. In a 2006 survey of 400 employers, three quarters of respondents said that high school grads lack interpersonal skills. The problem is so bad and enduring that bookshelves are being stocked with titles like Peggy Klaus' "The Hard Truth About Soft Skills: Workplace Lessons Smart People Wish They'd Learned Sooner."

Klaus coaches soft skills for clients such as JP Morgan Chase, Chevron, and the National Football League. In a recent New York Times article about soft skills in the workplace, she noted, "recruiters come back and say ... second-year M.B.A.s are brilliant at quantitative skills, but they don't know things like how to get along, work in a team or be good communicators."

The news is not much better closer to home. A 2006 survey of members of the Institute for Emerging Issues' Business Committee on Higher Education revealed similar problems. Over half of the respondents, representing 19 industries and over 65,000 employees across the state (and many more than that outside of North Carolina), said that the current labor pool lacked the necessary level of soft skills.

As a new crop of graduates readies to cross the stage, we must ask ourselves as educators, friends and family whether we hold our young folks to the line. Have we prepared them with the simple manners, the soft skills, they need to succeed? If not, why not?

Where do businesses expect students to get those skills? If not at home, then they must get them in our schools. As educators, friends and family, we must require more. If we care about the success of our children, we must strive to model manners, respect, timely arrival and active listening skills ourselves. Once we've set the example, we must actively require them in our homes and classrooms. Sometimes this requires some tough love.

I teach developmental English at Fayette-ville Technical Community College. Sometimes a bright and dedicated student thinks it's OK to arrive late if they are stuck in traffic or due to a myriad of personal problems. Day after day, they drag the drama in the door and disrupt the class.

But I've warned them -- in person and in writing. They know that one minute late is a tardy and three tardies equal an absence. More than 20 minutes late -- absent. Miss four classes -- failed. I warn them and then let them make their choices.

I've had other students who talk to others as I lead the class, interrupt incessantly for personal questions, and degrade others with constant criticism and discouragement. Each time, it's clear that the other students want the self-absorbed, time-eating interlopers stopped. Even though I stop them, talk to them, and work with them, it can take a semester for them to see how their behavior turns the class team against them. In a work setting, this behavior certainly frustrates the boss and dims any prospects for success.