It’s Thanksgiving, so it’s time for North Carolina politicos to count their blessings. As always, we have a few suggestions:
Roy Cooper is thankful for House Bill 2, which galvanized opposition to Gov. Pat McCrory even though Cooper never explained what he thinks about transgender bathroom use.
McCrory is thankful for the dead people and convicted felons who might have voted, giving him an opportunity to protest what he calls voter fraud.
The TV viewers of North Carolina are thankful that advertising is not part of a recount process.
Never miss a local story.
Fact-checkers are thankful that Donald Trump’s victory has secured them four years of steady employment.
N.C. Supreme Court Justice-elect Mike Morgan, who scored a surprise victory for Democrats in a Republican-dominated election, is not sure who to thank.
Republican N.C. Court of Appeals candidates are thankful the legislature added party labels to help guide Trump supporters to their names.
Senate leader Phil Berger Sr. is thankful that his son, Phil Berger Jr., got elected to the Court of Appeals and won’t need help getting a job for the next eight years.
Sen. Richard Burr is thankful no one is asking him about his schedule anymore. He’s also grateful for the ACLU and 1990s news archives.
Air horns are thankful for McCrory, and for protesters who think chanting isn’t obnoxious enough.
Public Policy Polling is thankful for fake candidates like Deez Nuts, who helped draw attention to their election polls.
The press corps is thankful for the thick skins of North Carolina politicians.
Send tips to firstname.lastname@example.org.