Cancer survivor dispenses hope

Cary woman gains strength to fight cancer by listening, and giving, to those who suffer

To the immigrant family being evicted because their landlord doesn't want tenants who are receiving rent subsidies. To the woman with a diseased breast who can't afford a mammogram.

And to the man who'd rather forgo a Christmas gift so he can buy food.

To all these people, Barbara Garlock has two words: Have hope.

It's not a flip recommendation. She has sat with them for hours, listening to their problems and working to find solutions. Nor is it a naive bit of advice. Two years ago, when her breast cancer re-emerged in her bones, everyone, including her doctors, braced for the worst.

Rather, Garlock has hope borne of her faith and of a conviction that God is there even in the midst of suffering.

For the past several months, this red-haired, 5-foot-1 volunteer at Cary's St. Francis United Methodist Church has generously dispensed hope to all who come her way.

Today, as Garlock, 48, celebrates Christmas with her family -- the first "normal" Christmas she's had in several years -- she is mindful that Jesus was born in abject poverty to give hope to those without.

Suffering draws Garlock.

"The space surrounding suffering is holy ground," she says. "I feel a sense of awe and humility to be invited into someone's pain."

In 2006, Garlock was an accomplished lawyer who left two of the region's most prestigious firms -- first Kilpatrick Stockton and then Wyrick Robbins -- to go to divinity school. A few weeks into her studies, a bone scan and MRI revealed that her breast cancer had spread to her bones.

Not wanting to die in her bedroom, she had a hospital bed stationed in her Cary living room while she recuperated from massive doses of chemotherapy and radiation. A ruptured appendix, an operation to remove her ovaries and a host of other complications ensued.

But in March, with her cancer in remission and her health slowly returning, she responded to a call from her pastors to help with the flood of people coming to the church door seeking emergency assistance.

By September, she had organized a regional conference for other churches offering emergency help. By December, her voicemail was full three days in a row. Both Wake County Social Services and Progress Energy had begun referring people to her.

"Barbara has really brought to this ministry an appreciation of human dignity," says the Rev. Tom Hollis, pastor of St. Francis United Methodist. "The people coming in through these doors are going to get a warm reception and be listened to for as long as it takes."

A meeting with a person seeking help can easily last three hours. Last week when a middle-aged woman came in asking for money to fill her sick husband's 11 prescriptions, Garlock was able to promise her $200. Then she got on the phone and started calling around to pharmacies to negotiate prices for insulin and anti-clotting medication.

"Do you have any kind of discount program?" she asked one pharmacist.

"Do you know of someplace that might be cheaper?" she asked another.

Between calls, she turned to the woman and said, "I want you to know, it's a privilege to have you here."

Long after lunchtime, Garlock was telling the woman about a program that could help her pay the heating bills and a ministry that provides boxes of food to people regardless of income.

Finally she asked, "What about Christmas for you? Would you like a gift card?"

The people she has helped appreciate her attentions.

"I've been in the U.S. almost 10 years," says Jasmin Arnautovic, a Bosnian refugee living in Apex for whom Garlock arranged free legal help. "I've never seen anybody help me as much as she has."