She just lived that way until a therapist diagnosed her with bipolar disorder.

Far from shrinking from this news, Davidson embraced it. She sought help, joined a support group and spoke about her struggles.

On Saturday morning, Davidson brought her team of mental health advocates from Salisbury to take part in the state's National Alliance on Mental Illness fundraising walk in Raleigh.

With medication, Davidson said, she's doing fine.

"Now I can slow down and complete a job I'm trying to do," she said.

Davidson was one of about 350 participants in Saturday's event, a 2.3-mile walk around the picturesque grounds of the Dorothea Dix Hospital, which is scheduled to close next month.

The state Department of Health and Human Services is moving forward with plans to simultaneously close Dix and John Umstead Hospital in Butner in favor of a new facility that will offer 432 patient beds -- 171 fewer than are now at Dix and Umstead.

The opening of the new Central Regional Hospital in Butner has been repeatedly delayed because of design flaws that could endanger patient safety, and because of problems attracting enough qualified workers for the Granville County facility.

The state is moving ahead with the closure plan in the midst of a bungled reform effort that was intended to ease demand for psychiatric hospital beds. Under the reform plan, more patients were to be directed toward outpatient, community-based care provided by private companies. The opposite has happened, and all four state mental hospitals now open routinely have to place those who need treatment on lengthy waiting lists or divert them to private facilities, often many hours away.

State mental health administrators plan to temporarily keep open a 60-bed ward at Dix after the rest of the hospital closes, as well as 115 beds at Umstead, in an attempt to blunt the impact of the hospital closures.

Still, advocates for the mentally ill are worried the closures will make an already dire shortage of treatment options even worse.

Closing Dix is shortsighted in light of the failed reform efforts, said David Haley of Durham. Haley and his wife, Bettie Ann, participated in Saturday's event on behalf of their son, who has schizophrenia.

Haley said he expects the Dix closing to force more people with mental illness to the streets.

"The services are not only needed, they need to be expanded," David Haley said. "Mentally ill people don't get services. The only alternative is homelessness. Or jail."

Chris Laughlin, 21, has Asperger's syndrome, a form of autism. He has not been treated at Dix but thinks its closing is a mistake simply because too many people need the care. And he fears that the mentally ill don't have a strong enough collective message to get this point across.

"The voice of the mentally ill isn't being heard," said Laughlin, who lives near Pinehurst. "If it was, they wouldn't be knocking it [Dix] down."

Those who walked Saturday hope making themselves more visible will raise awareness about mental illness. The event was akin to a carnival, with music, food, games for children and even a magician. Some participants brought dogs decked out in T-shirts with the NAMI logo.

"It's about getting the word out that people aren't crazy who have mental illness," Davidson said.

The organization has been organizing similar walks across the country for six years, and momentum is building, said Blair Young, a regional walk manager for the national organization. This year's walk in Raleigh raised about $80,000. As the organization picks up more members each year and mental illness becomes less of a societal mystery, that number should rise significantly, he said.

"In 10 years or less, this will be a half-a-million-dollar walk," Young said.

(Staff writer Michael Biesecker contributed to this story.)

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