One irate mother called to say her son deserved to have his picture in the newspaper and an article written about him. He works hard, his mother said, and he has accomplished a lot. The coach doesn't give him enough recognition, and he deserves more attention.

Another parent said the paper wasn't supplying enough "ink" to help her child obtain a scholarship. The lack of a college scholarship was the coach's fault to a degree, but the paper had a responsibility to promote her child because "he deserves it," she said.

Then there was the group of parents who called because their team hadn't received enough attention. They deserved more.

The team had been quite successful, had won many accolades. But the newspaper had ruined the experience. Instead of being elated, the team was depressed because it deserved more attention and praise than it received.

What do athletes really deserve?

A GREAT COACH: Someone who treats each player with respect and expects respect.

A coach who sees athletics as an extension of the classroom and teaches in that arena.

A person who coaches to help kids rather than one who coaches to notch victories on his belt.

Someone who builds players' self-esteem.

A coach who exhibits high moral standards.

A coach who realizes that controlling his or her own emotions is one of the most important jobs.

Someone who realizes that life isn't fair, you don't get lucky often and that officials are honorable people trying to do a difficult job.

A coach who realizes that even an average official is better than having the kids "call their own."

A coach who tries to make participating fun.

A coach who realizes all parents are irrational when it comes to their child, and that this is good because parents should care a lot.

GREAT PARENTS: Parents who don't criticize their athlete's teammates or coaches.

Parents who realize the benefits from participating in athletics aren't limited to the starters.

Parents who don't expect their child to earn an athletics scholarship, because scholarships always should be a surprise.

Parents who offer as much encouragement for their child in academics as in athletics.

Parents who don't judge their child's worth by athletics.

Parents who can appreciate their child's accomplishments without comparing them to the achievements of others.

Parents who try to attend events.

Parents who realize that in the long run, not even a state title compares favorably with the values that are taught in athletics.

Parents who don't try to live vicariously through their children.

GREAT ADMINISTRATORS: Principals who provide adequate equipment for students to participate safely.

Administrators who aren't distraught that the sports team creates more excitement than the school's academic achievements.

Principals who see athletics as an extension of the classroom.

Administrators who judge the worth of coaches not by wins on the field, but by victories with children.

Isn't it a shame that people don't always get what they deserve?

(I wrote this column, which appeared in The N&O on March 22, 1998. At the start of another season, it is good to reflect on what high school football players and other athletes deserve.)

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