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Fall TV: ‘Grandfathered’ family is just too dumb to be funny

John Stamos as Jimmy and Layla/Emelia Golfieri as Edie in “Grandfathered.”
John Stamos as Jimmy and Layla/Emelia Golfieri as Edie in “Grandfathered.” Erica Parise/FOX

New show: Grandfathered

When: 8 p.m. Tuesdays on Fox

Cast: John Stamos, Josh Peck, Paget Brewster

Premise: Stamos is Jimmy Martino, a playboy chef/restaurateur who is forced to rethink his life and priorities when he learns that he has an adult son AND the son has a baby daughter. So, Jimmy, who is worried about a single gray hair in the opening scene, suddenly realizes he’s a – gulp! – grandfather!

It’s a decent premise, and Stamos does his usual amiable pretty boy thing. But I just don’t buy that any 52-year-old could be this stupid about how to react around a baby.

My WarmTV colleague, Brooke Cain, and I often agree on shows. But in this case, there is a distinct split – she liked “Grandfathered” and I did not. My guess is that she is so enamored of Stamos’ puppy-dog eyes and perfect hair that she is grading on a curve. Her guess is that I’m just jealous of Stamos because we are the same age and he has been MUCH better preserved than me. There’s truth in both these guesses. (Seriously, it’s like the dude DOES NOT AGE!)

In the pilot alone, Jimmy accidentally changes the diaper of a stranger’s child instead of his own granddaughter. He leaves the baby unattended in a busy kitchen (with a restaurant staff that apparently has never encountered a child either). And he takes the baby’s temperature, rectally, with a kitchen meat thermometer. Yes, you read that right, though Stamos does suggest that the cook not use that thermometer for the food anymore.

Peck, as Gerald, Jimmy’s surprise son, and Brewster as Sara, Jimmy’s ex and Gerald’s mom, seem equally clueless. (Sara never told the now-adult Gerald anything about his father because “he never asked.”)

By the end of the first episode – when all the characters are gathered at the only hospital in the world where a doctor takes a baby into an ER room while all the child’s parents/guardians calmly stay in the waiting room – I just wanted to call social services and get this poor girl away from all these people.