In your unending search for a better golf game, have you considered eating Golf Mints, which assert that "Fresh breath keeps the bogeys away?"
They are available at your local golf store, along with other aids like putter holders, which provide a separate, easy-to-access space for your putter. Also available are cigar minders, thingies that hold your cigar while you go hit your duck hook.
Golf stores are to players what Disneyland is to kids. Some people come in just to look around. Some hear about something new and want to try it in a simulator. Golfers are that way, convinced that there is an answer to their problems there among the rows of glistening irons along the walls, the drivers thrusting their heads up to be noticed and envied, the putters lined up offering high tech aid to the putting impaired.
And then there is all that other stuff -apparel, for example. You, too, can dress like Rickie Fowler. Those odd-looking hats he wears, the shirts and slacks and shoes he models in pink, orange, blue, white, black, yellow, stripes, they're available. Lots of girls follow Rickie around the course but the attire may not work for everyone, like, say Lumpy Herron.
Sign Up and Save
Get six months of free digital access to The News & Observer
Among other items available in this wonderland of golf are some things called low-drag tees. They look from a distance like all other pegs but apparently technology has reduced the amount of drag a tee can cause when you hit off of one. I need some of those. I can't afford to lose a quarter of an inch or whatever my tees inflict on my game.
There's a glove keeper available, a plastic hand on which you can put your glove to keep it from something or other. For the absent-minded, there is a stroke counter, a handy item I would recommend to some of the scoundrels with whom I play.
There are warm-up weights and what is described as a grip trainer, simply a rubber ball to be squeezed.
While you're there at the store, you can try out the putters on a carpet or you can test clubs in a simulator with one of the store personnel offering advice.
I may go back and get some of those mints that keep the bogeys away. I'm a golfer. I'll try anything.