Letters to the Editor

Steven Mercado: Fun with voting

Readers will recall that our elected lifeforms have enacted a photo-ID voting requirement. Since we have no voter fraud problem, the requirement is a mystery to me.

Anyway, early voting started recently and is the first time photo ID is required. Among acceptable IDs were a North Carolina driver’s license or a passport.

I decided it would be a cute and sardonic protest gesture (cue: wife rolling eyes) to take my actual passport.

On the first day of early voting, our polling place was packed. We all waited clutching our driver’s licenses with the exception of me brandishing my large, blue “ironic document.” Laughter from other voters seeing me wave it about.

When my turn came, with a flourish I handed over my passport to the surprised poll worker, deadpanning that I’d heard if someone brings an actual passport they’re entitled to two votes.

She opened the passport and studied it gravely. Returning it, she looked up, smiled, and said brightly, “Actually, sir, you’re entitled to three votes. And, sir, remember: Vote early ... and vote often!”

This comeback elicited appreciative laughs from her fellow workers. Don’t that just beat all? Guess I’m not the only smart-mouth hereabouts.

Steven Mercado