Chris Porter stays away from controversial material like the NFL steers clear of Colin Kaepernick.
“I avoid politics and religion and anything else like that which isn’t fun,” Porter says while calling from his Los Angeles home. “I want everyone to come out and see me to have a good time. These are very polarizing times. I don’t want to bring anyone down. If they want to experience what I won’t talk about, just watch CNN.”
When Porter performs Friday and Saturday at Goodnights Comedy Club, guests can expect personal bits. “I like to talk about dating and random stuff like that,” Porter says. “I can make people happy by just talking about how bad my dating experiences are. I just got dumped. We were friends for 12 years. We dated for two months and that was it. I guess I’m like that restaurant you drive by all of the time. When you finally go in there, you realize it’s not so good and you leave.”
Porter could give perennial lovelorn comic Richard Lewis a run for his money in the sad sack department. However, don’t feel bad for Porter, who is enjoying life in Los Angeles much more than he did in his native Kansas.
“I went back to Kansas for Thanksgiving and there was six inches of snow on the ground,” Porter says. “My blood has thinned since living in LA. I had to get out. I love living in Los Angeles.”
Porter talks about his adoptive city during his act. The “Last Comic Standing” alum loves running into Hollywood’s has-beens.
“Everyone asks me if I see any Kardashians and the answer is no,” Porter says. “We don’t run in the same circles. I only see weird celebrities. I just did a show and Kato Kaelin was part of it. He’s a super nice guy and my favorite thing about him is that he will talk about the past. But what tops that is a recent experience with Fabio. We’re in an Italian restaurant and Fabio walks in and my mother couldn’t stop laughing. He was just being very Fabio but my mother had to leave the room since she was in hysterics.”
Porter wears glasses but may need to visit an ophthalmologist soon since he recently failed to recognize super model Cindy Crawford backstage at a concert after they were introduced. “She told me her name is Cindy and I still couldn’t figure out who [she]was,” Porter admits. “In my defense, it was dark there and I wasn’t on her mole side.”
Too much complaining
Wimpiness bothers Porter. “It’s one thing to be in touch with your emotions but what’s going on today is ridiculous,” Porter says. “People complain more than ever and I like to talk about how people don’t do anything. We hire people to do simple things. When I was growing up, we fixed things. We didn’t go to an app to see who we could hire to help. When we needed a deck, my dad built it. We would go out and get wood and some bolts and build the thing. I can’t help but compare this era to how things were 20 years ago.”
Porter will be making his debut in the Triangle. “I’m surprised that I’ve never been to Raleigh,” Porter says. “I’m preparing for it. I bought some new undershirts and a coat. It’ll be cold in Raleigh. Cold to me is anything under 50 degrees. Remember that my blood is thin since I’ve been out in Los Angeles for a long time.”
Who: Chris Porter
Where: Goodnights Comedy Club, 861 W. Morgan Street, Raleigh
When: Friday and Saturday, 7:30 p.m. and 10 p.m.
Tickets: $22 and $30 Friday, $25 and $33 Saturday
More information: 919-828-5233 ,www.goodnightscomedy.com