Mother of baby with Down syndrome tells doctor who recommended abortion ‘My child was perfect’

Courtney Baker said she and a friend had very different experiences when they found out they were pregnant with children who had Down syndrome.

A doctor told Baker’s friend that her baby was perfect, while Baker’ doctor had a different message for her: He immediately recommended she abort the baby.

When the woman from Sanford, Florida refused, she said the doctor continued to try to convince her.

“You asked us again if we understood how low our quality of life would be with a child with Down syndrome,” Baker said. “You suggested we reconsider our decision to continue the pregnancy.”

More than a year later, the mother of now 15-month-old Emersyn Faith decided to send a letter to that doctor, hoping that he’ll reconsider those statements for future patients who have children with Down syndrome.

“Every action from opening and closing the mailbox, to raising the red flag, was closure for me,” Baker told ABC News. “I have no idea how the doctor might have reacted to my letter, but I do have faith that God can work any miracle and He can change any heart.”

The letter said:

“Dear Doctor,

A friend recently told me of when her prenatal specialist would see her child during her sonograms, he would comment, ‘He’s perfect.’ Once her son was born with Down syndrome, she visited that same doctor. He looked at her little boy and said, ‘I told you. He’s perfect.’

Her story tore me apart. While I was so grateful for my friend’s experience, it filled me with such sorrow because of what I should have had. I wish you would have been that doctor.

I came to you during the most difficult time in my life. I was terrified, anxious and in complete despair. I didn’t know the truth yet about my baby, and that’s what I desperately needed from you. But instead of support and encouragement, you suggested we terminate our child. I told you her name, and you asked us again if we understood how low our quality of life would be with a child with Down syndrome. You suggested we reconsider our decision to continue the pregnancy.

From that first visit, we dreaded our appointments. The most difficult time in my life was made nearly unbearable because you never told me the truth. My child was perfect.

I’m not angry. I’m not bitter. I’m really just sad. I’m sad the tiny beating hearts you see every day don’t fill you with a perpetual awe. I’m sad the intricate details and the miracle of those sweet little fingers and toes, lungs and eyes and ears don’t always give you pause. I’m sad you were so very wrong to say a baby with Down syndrome would decrease our quality of life. And I’m heartbroken you might have said that to a mommy even today. But I’m mostly sad you’ll never have the privilege of knowing my daughter, Emersyn.

Because, you see, Emersyn has not only added to our quality of life, she’s touched the hearts of thousands. She’s given us a purpose and a joy that is impossible to express. She’s given us bigger smiles, more laughter and sweeter kisses than we’ve ever known. She’s opened our eyes to true beauty and pure love.

So my prayer is that no other mommy will have to go through what I did. My prayer is that you, too, will now see true beauty and pure love with every sonogram.

And my prayer is when you see that next baby with Down syndrome lovingly tucked in her mother’s womb, you will look at that mommy and see me then tell her the truth: ‘Your child is perfect.’”

She also wrote an open letter on Facebook to other mothers who found out their babies would have Down syndrome.

“As deeply as you’re wounded in this moment, your pain will be forgotten and you’ll wonder why you ever felt it in the first place,” Baker wrote.

This story was originally published June 7, 2016 at 4:15 PM with the headline "Mother of baby with Down syndrome tells doctor who recommended abortion ‘My child was perfect’."