Dana Stone: Power of forgiveness

Like many others, I was impressed by how the relatives of those slain in Charleston could forgive the killer. And so soon after the tragedy.

For insight, I turned to a book by Desmond and Mpho Tutu called “The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World.” This book introduced me to the profound truths to be found in the act of forgiveness.

As Tutu put it, without forgiveness, South Africa would have had no future. He went on to say that “rage and revenge would have been our destruction.” The Tutus tell us that “forgiveness is not for the faint of heart.”

They tell the story of Bishop Malusi Mpumlwana, who endured torture by the South African police. In the midst of his suffering, he experienced an insight: “These were God’s children and are losing their humanity. We must help them recover it.”

Not forgiving holds us in bondage. Feelings of resentment and rage keep us tied to the situation or person who hurt us. We want to retaliate and may seek revenge, keeping the resentment cycle going. Forgiveness allows us to accept our grief and to heal ourselves.

The eyes of the world are on Charleston. By offering forgiveness, the relatives of those murdered may have prevented a race war.

This story was originally published July 10, 2015 at 5:36 PM with the headline "Dana Stone: Power of forgiveness."